According to the scientists, the way people do things is the wrong way to do things, and could hypothetically be disastrous. So, I have written this article to help you to stop doing things wrong, so that you don't end up accidentally killing an octopus, or other potential disasters.
1. Back Scratchers
When using a back scratcher, make sure you scratch in an up and down, side to side, diagonal, or circular motion. Simply tapping the itch with the back scratcher won't help the itch.
2. Eating Things
When eating things, make sure you first: take a bite, then chew, then swallow, in that order. Attempting to eat in any other order won't really do anything.
3. Listening to the Radio
If you've been jumping up and down on your radio, as you would a trampoline, you've actually been misusing it. This may actually damage your radio. The proper function of a radio is to emit audio signals. The proper way to listen to a radio, is to turn it on and allow it to play the audio, while your ears receive the audio signals.
4. Fencing
Everybody fences, yet almost nobody does it properly. Make sure, when fencing, that you don't change a lightbulb, mow the lawn, groom your cuticles, or go for a boat ride, or your opponent will win the match.
5. Sleeping
Often times, when sleeping, people will place their shoes on the floor. You will actually take in fewer calories if you hang them on the wall, instead.
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